Why Saying TOO Much, Is Costing You Sales!
by: Craig Garber
Some things are better left unsaid, and when it comes to writing sales copy, saying TOO much, will in fact, cost you sales.
Look, writing sales copy isn't easy -- everybody knows that. But how do you know when you haven't said enough... and when you've said too much?
Here, come closer and I'll tell you a little story:
Well, we've completed our move and we're finally settling
into our new home.
If you were one of the people who sent me "good luck"
wishes,
then I want to thank you VERY much for your kind thoughts.
Here's a funny thing that happened to us on the way over.
Anne was in her car with our younger son and our daughter,
and Iwas in the Wrangler with my oldest son Nick.
Coming across the state from Fort Lauderdale, we decided to
take the more "scenic" local state roads instead of the
interstate.
So we get off the Florida Turnpike at Yeehaw Junction (yes,
that really is the name of the city) and started driving
west
across State Road 60.
No sooner do you get on State Road 60 though, you suddenly
realize there are benefits to taking the interstate -- like
signs of life, for instance.
State Road 60 is a virtually empty slab of roadway,
surrounded by nothing by citrus trees... cow pastures...
remnants of what were once "happening" burger joints on the
side of the road, but have long since been reduced to the
equivalent of structural road-kill... and...
HUGE FREAKIN' ALLIGATORS!
Yes, alligators.
We were about a half-mile into our westward journey across
the state, and on the right side of the road -- just outside
the
fencing around the cattle pastures -- we saw the
absolute largest alligator I've EVER seen, lying dead on its
side.
As best as I can tell, it had to be somewhere between 7 and
8 feet long, with an absolutely enormous girth around --
who knows, maybe it swallowed one of those cows before it
got ran over by a truck or something.
Nick and I immediately called my wife on her cell phone (she
was driving behind me) to ask if she had seen the
gator, and sure enough -- the three of them were wide-eyed
and all excited over it, just like we were.
Today, we're still settling in of course, and fortunately,
the lion's share of
our boxes were picked up by the garbage guys this morning.
And in a few more days, with some luck, I may even be able
to see the floor
of my office.
Who knows?
Anyhow, let me tell you a quick marketing lesson you can
learn, from two very dirty four letter words, I'm having to
learn very quickly now.
Those two words are "yard work".
See, back in Plantation, which was a suburb of Fort
Lauderdale, we had a small front lawn our
homeowners association maintained, and I hired a lawn guy to
mow the back yard once a week, for 10 bucks a pop.
No brainer, right?
But now, lakeside living's... a little... different.
For example, you get a rainstorm -- and all those big
cypress trees
leave loads of twigs and moss all over your deck out back.
Windy?
Pine needles shed all over your driveway.
Oh, and even though we've got pavers all over the place --
weeds -- and a seemingly endless amount of them at that --
dependably get between every single crack and crevice in
those
pavers, easier than James Bond can infiltrate an enemy
compound.
I live on a gorgeous 93-acre spring-fed lake. The white
sandy bottom looks great -- as long as the undergrowth is
regularly pulled up.
Put it this way -- in addition to living in a beautiful
place, I've also just bought myself (and my sons) a few new
chores in addition to the ones we already have.
Now surely, a lot of this stuff sounds worse that it is, but
imagine if the seller (a great guy by the way) had spent
time telling me about all that extra work that has to be
done, instead of just showing me all the unique benefits of
living here?
I MAY not have bought this house, or at least... I would
have
given it a LOT more thought.
Are you doing something similar to this in your marketing,
unconscoiusly perhaps, without even knowing it?
Are you talking about all the "work" that needs to get done,
for your customer to experience the most out of your goods
and
services?
Because nearly every single piece of sales copy I review
says something like, "Look, this stuff won't work for you
on it's own. You've really got to sit down and use it to
make your life better."
Or are you being smart and telling your prospects about all
the incredible benefits your product's offering them,
and how they'll change their life by ordering?
Be smarter than your competition -- just because "yard work"
comes along with owning a lake-house -- doesn't mean you
want to spend all your time talking about lifting rakes...
mowing lawns... and running back-and-forth to Home Depot
every other day.
Talk about relaxing out there in the warm jacuzzi
overlooking
your lake instead.
Make sense?
By the way, I'll post up some pictures of our new home
sometime in the next few days.
Now go sell something,
Craig Garber
http://www.KingOfCopy.com
P.S. Check out all the prior archives you've been
missing, right here at:
http://www.kingofcopy.com/tips/tiparchives.html
About The Author:
Craig Garber is America's Top Direct-Response Copywriter. Uncover hundreds of FREE controversial direct-response copywriting and marketing tips that dramatically boost your sales and your response rates, right here: http://www.kingofcopy.com.
March 2006
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